The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the bokeh ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist memek the next morning, bokeh she rolled her eyes and bokep declared the bokep woman an ‘actrice’, porn or memek sex worker.

Now, bokep according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, porn it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokeh all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokeh you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, bokep and memek sex as genuine intimacy. And porn when a woman is genuinely aroused, memek porn trusts her partner and bokeh is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, memek she’s bokeh far more likely bokep to gently sigh and crot moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days memek editing The Erotic Review magazine, crot porn female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, crot they’d explain, bokeh so they could make porn their partner feel happy, bokeh while conserving their energy for bokeh other memek tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study bokeh by crot two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and porn ‘manipulation’, bokeh and bokep that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, memek so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder memek the cry of ecstasy, memek the greater the chance the bokeh orgasm porn is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokep ‘I’m enjoying bokep this, memek but can bokep you get a bloomin’ move bokeh on.’ Sound bokeh familiar, bokeh ladies?

The only bokeh other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education bokep comes from porn, bokeh where memek loud always equals memek better.

As a woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their crot TVs: memek ‘As far crot porn as I’m concerned, crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokep only crot if you want porn to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, crot Sex At Dawn, bokeh Christopher Ryan and memek Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason bokeh women were noisy porn during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and bokeh keen to copulate.

If you’re memek a sex bokeh worker, memek I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokep then men should take heed: bokeh the best sex may just bokeh be the quietest.

Paris