The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been crot haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where bokep I porn was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an crot exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word bokep for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, memek she rolled her eyes and bokep declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokep or crot sex worker.

Now, memek according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, memek it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and memek all men crot dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, memek you bokep can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: bokeh there’s sex as performance art, bokeh and bokep sex as porn genuine intimacy. And bokep when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokeh trusts her partner and bokep bokep is not fearing for crot a fragile male crot ego, memek she’s far more likely to gently sigh and memek moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, porn female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, crot they’d explain, porn so they could make their partner feel happy, crot while conserving their energy for memek other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and porn ‘manipulation’, memek and bokeh that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over memek the finishing porn line, crot so to porn speak.

A bokep new study confirms the louder the cry memek of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: porn ‘I’m enjoying this, porn but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, memek ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is crot if your sex education comes from porn, crot where loud crot always equals better.

As a porn woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out crot their TVs: crot bokeh ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokeh that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, porn only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, memek Sex At Dawn, porn Christopher Ryan and bokeh bokep Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex porn – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby porn males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, porn I can understand crot the need to advertise. But if you’re not, crot then men should take heed: memek the best sex may just crot be the quietest.

Paris